How radical hospitality sparked an unexpected conversion
By Charles Gardner
A feminist English professor at an American university, steeped in LGBTQ+ ideology and identifying as lesbian herself, could surely not have then believed that she would one day become a pastor’s wife.
But Rosaria Champagne Butterfield was, over time, totally transformed from the unbelieving sceptic she had been before. A tenured professor at Syracuse University, she was in the process of researching a book designed to expose the frailties of the ‘Religious Right’ as judgemental, out of date and irrelevant to modern life – when the challenge came.
Unexpected letter
After publishing a critique of the Promise Keepers men’s movement in a local newspaper, she held her breath for the usual hate mail when, quite unexpectedly, she received a kind and enquiring letter from a pastor. He didn’t berate her, or hit her over the head with Bible quotes, but simply asked some questions. Gently and kindly, he wanted to know where she was coming from, how she had arrived at her conclusions about life, and did they stand up to scrutiny?
He left his phone number, and Rosaria called him. She was invited round to the home he shared with his wife, and over a series of subsequent meals (around 500, she estimates!), eventually came to see things from a very different perspective. Holy Spirit-inspired hospitality, too often neglected these days, clearly had much to do with it.
Gradually, as she opened herself up to the Bible and its teachings, her entire lifestyle and worldview were turned upside down.
After reading through the entire Bible a few times, she recalls: “The Bible got to be bigger inside me than I. And it absolutely overflowed into my world. I really fought against it. And then one Sunday morning, no different from any other Sunday morning, I rose from the bed of my lesbian lover, and an hour later I sat in a pew at the Syracuse Reformed Presbyterian Church. I went there feeling very conspicuous, aware that I didn’t fit in. But I really had to confront this God.”
Costly and traumatic
As she writes in her first book, ‘The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert’ (Crown and Covenant Publications, expanded edition, 2014), “This was my conversion in a nutshell: I lost everything but the dog.”
She became “a single ex-lesbian with a now defunct PhD” – a very costly and traumatic process during which she lost many friends. Over a decade after its publication, as the Western Church continues to grapple with biblical teaching on sexuality, her story is a frank reminder of the true cost of discipleship.
Describing herself as “a bastion of leftist political activism”, she candidly admits that “conversion put me in a complicated and comprehensive chaos”.
But, in the end, she gained the greatest friend of all – Jesus! The formerly staunch advocate of so-called alternative lifestyles became an ardent follower of Christ who, in time, aged 39, married a pastor!
Fostering and adoption
And to complete her social revolution, the happy couple began fostering and adopting children abandoned to their fate, pouring out love and compassion on kids who would otherwise have had little chance in life. Now an experienced home educating mother, she subsequently published a book called ‘The Gospel Comes with a House Key’ (Crossway, 2018), calling believers back to “radically ordinary hospitality” in which “strangers become neighbours, and… neighbours become part of your family of God”. She encourages families to make a habit of reading the Bible and praying together – from her own experience, this nightly routine can turn into an unexpected evangelism tool when unsaved guests are present.
Rosaria was truly the ‘new creation’ the Bible portrays of those who have allowed Jesus into their hearts. She continues, with her husband Kent, to encourage other budding disciples along the way of service and proclamation of the Gospel which alone has the power to change the world. At the time her first book was published, the couple were living in North Carolina, having earlier spent time in Pennsylvania, Virginia and New York State.
Not all Christians are bigots
Sadly, in her previous life, Rosaria got used to receiving hate mail from ‘Christians’ denouncing her views, which could well have turned her off considering faith in Christ. Thankfully, the Christlike Pastor Ken Smith was of a different hue, and her lesbian friends had to learn that not all Christians are bigots.
Among her many challenges in this profoundly honest account is how Bible characters like Mary Magdalene are rightly held up as examples of what Christ can do for sinners – yet ‘messed up’ people today are not so readily accepted. She adds: “Even though I’m no longer a lesbian, I’m still a sinner. I’m redeemed, but still fallen. And sin is sin. I believe that the Lord is more grieved by the sins of my current life than by my past life as a lesbian.” Now, by God’s grace and as part of the Reformed Presbyterian movement, she has found truth, wholeness and fulfilment through a life of sacrifice dedicated to Christ.
Rosaria’s books, articles and interviews are at rosariabutterfield.com
Change is possible
Now a vocal proponent of biblical sexual ethics, Rosaria has signed an international declaration calling national governments and the media “to recognise… the right to shape and develop one’s own sexual identity, feelings and associated behaviours, and to receive support to do so”. The document, signed by over 1,900 individuals including pastors, therapists and health professionals, was developed by the International Foundation for Therapeutic and Counselling Choice (IFTCC), and is available at iftcc.org/the-declaration.
UK charity Core Issues Trust (CIT), run by Dr Mike Davidson, exists to “support those leaving LGBT identities, behaviours, attractions and life choices”. CIT also runs X-Out-Loud, a project for people who identify as ex-LGBT. Many testimonies are available on their website: xoutloud.com.